Trials and Tribulations by Fire

Feb 18th 2007: Today I went to MGM Dizzeeworld. Exhilaration and pure ecstacy are some adjectives that would characterize the visit. Various fun rides such as the Ranger, the Flying ship take your breath away and try to make it a memorable visit. Well, I went with two friends, who are crazy enough to pay for this pure form of torture. I guess even the Russians can learn a thing or two from these people who design these rides! The rides are meant to be for people's amusement, hence the name, amusement park. But, to my absolute horror, one guy threw up, coloring the whole Flying ship with his internals and to the chagrin of his neighbors, never recovered from his ordeal. I went on the Roller-Coaster, the mini rollercoaster, dashed against my friends in the Dashing cars, got drenched in the Wet ride, and simply had fun. The fear of the scary Ranger and the Flying ship reigned supreme, and I dared not venture there. I stayed put and made sure, I was not emotionally blackmailed to take ...

29.... going on 30, in a coupla days. A little bit apprehensive about everything. I am. I don't know if this is correct or I am over-exaggerating. I always do that. I tend to crib, a lot. Cry some more, and act as if the world is falling in. Well, this seems to be the case, for the past few weeks. I am not sure where I will be in the next few months. Change. Is such a reluctant adversary. Ain't it. Heh. Moving on with a new job, feels as if I am leaving my household and moving on to a new life altogether. Technically this is not reality. But yeah, my mind has conjured up such ideas. It is real for my mind. Which in turn, seems to be real for me. The world feels I am a fool. I am sentimentally attached to my job, my workplace, and my friends. I am. No doubt about that. But, is it wrong. It ain't. But anyway, if you see it this way. If my friends get an opp for moving away to a better paypacket, wont they grab it. Well no harm in me doing the same. Isnt it. Hey. I am here to ...

Nithya Suresh Kaun Hai? Well, this would be the case a few hours ago. But now, 1 hour later, its a fact. A simple yeah, has completed my journey. Maybe I am crazy to say yes, without even thinking. But I had already decided to say yes even without meeting the guy. The Groom, to be exact. Suresh alias Subramanian, would have been my Prince Charming. A would be husband. But destiny had other plans in store. Suresh, withered away without even a trace. My beloved parents spurned him. He was shooed away, because, he turned out to be something else that he originally wasn't. His lies, had turned him into a non-performing asset. NPA. Suresh had to go. He had not completed the formalities. He had lied about his qualifications and job. He had to be stopped from starting the engagement formalities. A phone call took care of that. And an e-mail did the trick. I was relieved. Woudn't I?

Have you felt the need to confirm? The oppressive need to be right in someone else's eyes. This is a feeling that takes out your ego and tosses it unceremoniously out the window. I always have this feeling of incompleteness, of having to confirm to others. To say yes, when I want to say NO. Is this a common feeling or am I all alone in this? Maybe there are others. Other women. Seldom have I seen men being a Confirm freak. They have a whole society backing them up. What is right for them is right for the world. Ain't it. Well, this time round, I have decided to turn this thing on its head and say No. Finally. I have the courage to do it. But somewhere near my ribs I get a pull, that is difficult to handle, I am lost for words and my mind becomes bemuddled. Is it normal? I ask myself. But I want to do what I want to do. Not act according to some guy's whims and fancies. Is it too much? But then, this has a root in the year 1977. Or maybe 1978. I am not sure. When the mind go...

In this world filled with people - successful people, unsuccessful people, diseased people, cheaters, teachers, mothers, beggars, CEOs, anybody worth a dime, have they ever pondered on this - Is everything in their control? We perceive so. We think everything is in our hands. It gives us a boost and makes us feel very powerful. We feed our egos with this thought. But is it true? What can we control? Life? No. We can die anytime. Money? No. We can lose our job/business anytime to some unknown unimaginable catastrophe. Then what? The you are rendered homeless and have to depend on the State or the Society. This is true in the US. But what about the mere mortals in Indian states. They have to depend on their brethren. You cannot even control your own reflexes. You, the most powerful species on earth, with Intelligence, cannot do anything if your body suddenly stops working. Nothing. You can do something, though. You can cry. Feel sorry. Thats it. Ponder on this.............

Have you ever wondered if you were living all parts of your body totally and completely? Have you ever wondered how it would feel to feel and live with all the parts of your body? Do you know that people only accept certain parts of you. Rest, they simply reject. Maybe, because they aren't so comfortable with the parts. Leave alone other people, have you, as an individual, accepted your wholeness with all its flaws. Do you have the courage to face yourself?

Got a few minutes to chill out. So thought would write a blog on the travails of driving (riding) in the water-infested roads of Chennai. Chennai, the hot tropical metro where there are no winters. There are only summers, which are described as hot, hotter and hottest. LOL. The cyclone that has showered its love on the city was supposed to have moved on to AP. But my guess is that the rains (much needed) are here to stay, atleast for a short while. Rain or no rain, a person like me has to face the trecherous roads and reach office on time. Riding a bike in Chennai is like trying to play a guessing game every second. You need to remember each and every pothole on the road and try not to fall into any of the miniature manholes. Today, I stepped into the Adyar river when I came out of my bulding. The strong currents threatened to submerge my bike. I braved the waters and turned towards Kotturpuram. Then the ordeal started. I heard myself saying, Water water everywhere.... Reached office a...

We decided to woo a gastronomic delight called as Paav Bhaaji to our tummies, that lazy Saturday, 14th of October 2006, a day to remember, when two friends met and zoomed on the black machine to the 3rd Big friend's house. The Big friend had invited her friends to her "self-prepared lunch." It turned out that PP, one of the friends and the driver Nk were the ones who did it all. Well, in all honesty (Lest I get a virtual kick from Big!) I would tell you that Nk did nothing to the creation of the yummy Paav Bhaaji. Big got all the ingredients and PP barged into the small kitchen. Well, the kitchen is not small, but there are 2 cupboards that take up space. There is a small service veranda (where the Bai would show her talent) adjacent to the kitchen. Lets get onto the pictorial story of the day, when we met and made Paav Bhaaji, Mumbaiyya Ishtyle. This picture shows the cold haandi ready to be used for cooking. Lets go on to the chefs. They are ready and excited to start t...

October7th, 2006, went to Shirdi. A place where Sai Baba stayed and blessed his devotees and people who flocked to him. He was above all caste and creed and welcomed all and sundry with open arms. Sai Baba has a great following due to his gentleness and love for all human beings. Shirdi is supposed to be a very holy place and I had a deep want to go visit the place and feel the presence of the holy saint who once lived there. I went, with a lot of hope and wishes. I travelled to Pune and endured a treacherous drive on bumpy roads and arrived at Shirdi at 4 o' clock. It is a noisy Maharashtrian town, which has shaken off its village charms and has taken on the viles of the city. Around 150 - 200 kms from Pune, the bustling town draws a lot of tourists and piligrims from all over. Sai Baba calls devotees from every corner. He called me. I went. But a security guard, a mere mortal, made my encounter a bitter one. But I will go again. My relation is with the Baba, who soothed my pain a...

This is my version of Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehnaa. Please bear with it. :) Once upon a time, in Delhi, the capital of India, there lived a guy, called Small. He had an elder brother twelve years his senior, married, with two kids. The elder brother, Big, was very protective of his younger brother, Small, so much that he pampered the kid and spoiled him rotten.Small's mother wanted a daughter very badly, but as she had a son, she named him Pinky! Much to the frustration of the guy, his mum would dress him up in pink frocks and cute dresses. As he grew up nobody took him seriously. He grew frustrated and took to drinking, drugs and smoking. Eventually, Small wanted to leave home and live alone, as people at home were treating him like a child, though he was one. He travelled away from home, and got a great job in Nify Ltd. He took up a house and started his new life. Small got many friends in the firm. He became fast friends with a girl called, Lady. Lady fell in love with Small, as she ...